How to Transform Anger Into Love
By Jafree Ozwald
“When the power of love overcomes the love of power, the world will finally know peace.” ~Jimi Hendrix
One of the most destructive and constructive forces in the Universe is found inside the fiery energy of anger. This amazing energy is so powerful that it can melt through your personal fears, blocks, and insecurities and transform you into a truly passionate alive loving being. As you know, if this intense inner fire is not harnessed correctly, it can destroy the sacred love, joy and real power that is possible with your life. The key to this alchemical process is understanding the power of anger is found in its greatest weakness. Throughout this article we will explore this weakness and how to enter the fiery passionate anger energy on a deeper spiritual level so that you can discover how to use it as a gateway to enter the Divine.
In its purest form anger is simply raw potential energy. It’s like a tremendous fireball breathing inside you, that can fuel the manifestation of all your desires if you learn how not to be afraid of it and meet it intimately. To transform your anger into love you must be willing to surrender to a process that will take you on what may be the greatest spiritual journey of your life. You must be strong enough to be a channel for this potentially destructive energy and understand how to use it and not abuse it. Welcoming the fire in this passionate energy will open many doors to you which you once thought were closed. When you can truly awaken, befriend and tame this wild fire inside, you’ll become unstoppable and able to manifest massive positive outcomes all over your life.
Here’s a simple trick that may help you to find a healthy way to relate to anger. The next time you are overcome by the dramatic urgency to express or suppress your anger, imagine that a very hungry wild tiger has just entered the room. A very large ferocious beast is now circling you and about to pounce and kill you, and so what are you going to do? If you run it will chase you and eat you alive, and if you try to attack it the tiger will surely win. The best option is to be very very still, unmoving like a statue and soon it will stop moving too. Do not move a single muscle until a deeper conscious stillness enters your entire body and brain. Keep one eye on this ravenous feline as this crazy animal could turn on you in any moment thinking that you are its food. Until you feel this beast has totally left the room, be very conscious of the conversation going on in your head. The tiger may be nearby and could sniff you out again. Continue being very still and silent inside until you feel the crazy energy has relaxed enough for you to sit on its back and ride it, or has no interest into you and has walked away.
To master anything in this world, it’s important to understand it. The first thing to know about anger is that it stems from unmet desires formed by your ego. When the ego doesn’t get exactly what it wants when it wants it, it may thrash out at the world in a fit of fiery expression. What’s really going on underneath the surface is that the ego feels powerless and unable to manifest its desires. It’s even more accurate to say that the ego is powerlessness itself, and any attempt to operate your life from this helpless energy will only manifest into life experiences that are hard and challenging. The essential secret here is learning to be aware of when you are coming from ego, and when you are coming from your true peaceful power which is the God Source itself.
The ego is an identity you formed around who you think you are. It doesn’t have anything to do with the true spiritual source you truly are. When you can let go of the ideas and beliefs the ego has you imprisoned in, you can dive into finding the root cause of your anger. All anger stems from a lack of connection to your true spiritual source and power. When you find this connection you can heal the core wound inside you which is this powerlessness. The healing spiritual source naturally comes flooding through as you embrace your deepest wound. The moment you do this you’ll find your anger transforms into passion and your real spiritual journey in life begins.
One of the most important first steps towards emotional mastery comes through consciously approaching any feeling of being powerless. This means dropping through your anger and into the deepest core wound that is creating your anger in the first place. The powerless ego will try to avoid being seen and healed at all costs, so you must be a healing warrior here. When you dive inside yourself and reach that deeper emotional belief that says “I am powerless” notice who (or what) is it that is identifying with this experience. Investigate this idea that you are powerless over anything or anyone in your life, including your anger. Is it true? To find peace with these deep powerless feelings simply takes a willingness to let in the healing energy, and this is the only way you will find true freedom in this lifetime.
The consequence of not diving into anger and feeling your powerless disconnection to Source is enormous. If you cannot allow yourself to drop into your deepest helpless feeling and have the need to be “strong” in that moment, the ego has to resort to anger as a close replacement. By expressing anger at someone (or yourself) there’s this false sense of feeling powerful, which is then followed by feeling sad, guilty or ashamed at the uncentered demon you just became. Then a vicious downward self-hating spiral begins, and expands the more you tend to suppress or express your anger, making you feel even more powerless and frustrated than before.
In your practical daily life, having a truly conscious and healthy relationship with anger may seem like a huge impossible feat, yet think of it as a simple balancing act on the inner world. There are three basic ways to deal with anger to find your path to your balance and freedom with it. You have the choice to express it, suppress it, or transcend it. When you express it at a person, that dark violent energy will release from your body momentarily, then later take over your heart and your mind. If you suppress it, a rigid control structure is formed to stop this erupting volcano, which requires tons of your precious energy to keep you from exploding. When you choose to transcend anger, you are neither expressing nor repressing it. The passionate fiery energy rises from the forbidden gallows and you choose to dive into the core of it, until you reach your powerlessness and sit with your helpless wound. Then anger becomes this secret agent on your side empowering you with more focus, clarity, strength and the courage you need to heal your past, burn through the ego-mind and find the true peaceful divine infinite spirit you really are.
“There are only two ways to live your life. One, is as though there are no miracles and the other is as though everything is a miracle.” ~Albert Einstein
This transcendent approach to anger has many layers and steps to it. It often starts with feeling whatever you’re truly upset about, yet going deeper than the powerless story that tries to hook you in. Use your angry victim story to push you deeper inside, and go beyond the identity you’ve created around yourself in your story. The fire of anger will help you to burn through the ego on its own accord. Let it burn “you” away until there is nothing left of you. Notice that this story is the same powerless story you’ve been repeating to yourself your entire life. When your story takes on a slightly new flavor and color, the anger will loosen its grip on you. You will start to move beyond the reaction mode and move into more of a conscious response to it. The day you stop buying into your victim story is the day you arrive in the land of transcendence. It takes practice to be open to feeling the anger energy without getting caught in it. The more you meditate on the awareness that is aware of the anger, the easier it is to naturally transcend it without trying to control your expression or suppression of it.
On a practical level, I invite you to use complete stillness of the body to drill through that moment when anger would take over your mouth and mind. Just stop all movement anytime you feel anger arising and watch! Don’t express, don’t suppress, just observe. Wait to speak until the words you want to say are truly loving, compassionate and heart felt. Anger like any emotion is a natural energy that can be used to make life more juicy and powerful. To get authentically into this higher vibe place you must dive deeper than the angry victim story buried inside you. This is the key to unraveling the wound that is creating the anger in the first place. By using your hot fiery feelings as fuel they will push you deeper until you arrive at the source of your powerlessness and discover a well spring of healing that is inside the most wounded part of your being. This may not seem like something to get excited about yet it is by far the greatest discovery mankind has yet to find. It’s within your deepest most helpless feelings that you find the key to happiness. When you mix and merge your frozen powerlessness with this fiery anger, every fear, insecurity and hard feeling inside you will slowly start to dissolve.
It’s good to be aware that all the wounds you’ve never healed through your childhood and any broken relationships you’ve had will show up inside this healing process. The feeling of powerlessness is powerful and it can be very dark and very deep in there, so be sure to take the flashlight of pure awareness with you! Take the risk to peer through this darkness and be a friend to your deepest pain. This is the key to true life mastery. When you can sit with your illusion of powerlessness, knowing it is just a limiting belief keeping you stuck in life, you’ve started the path to becoming a truly healed human being and your anger will naturally turn into a beautiful passion for being alive. The real work here is in remaining curious about the gift that you get by diving through your anger and surrendering to the core of your powerlessness. At the very center of powerlessness is always the greatest peace. This is the sacred guidance that you need to find your way through this life.
When you have access to the source of love, you have found the ultimate flashlight that will bring you through any darkness. There is no need to vent your anger on anyone as long as you know and feel your connection to this source. The secret to finding it comes in many forms, one is exploring the qualities of infinite patience and unconditional love. By simply inviting in a feeling of infinite patience with everything you do in your daily life, getting caught in anger is truly impossible. You’ll soon find that you’re naturally relaxed with those people whom you once felt rushed with, or full of judgment, criticism and deep misunderstanding.
When you can sit with your helplessness and relax into it as if for an eternity, something truly miraculous happens. A gentle calming healing energy naturally trickles in and God’s love for you takes over. Our healing in life is so natural and effortless and happens on its own. When you stop picking at a scab and give it a loving bandage, you’re giving your wound the opportunity to heal. Emotional wounds naturally heal when you stop picking at them and give them love the moment they arise. When you are able to truly sit and be with your wounded feelings, not trying to fix them in any way, just being loving and gentle with them, they will all heal. It often only takes 10 seconds of courage and a few minutes of patience before you can feel the gentle energy inching its way into the wounded feeling.
Some people need to suffer greatly before they change their life course and start their healing process. It takes tremendous courage and a willingness to feel your powerlessness without covering it up with addictive substances or behaviors. Most people avoid feeling their core wound because its easier to be distracted by something that gives instant gratification. Yet, in the long run this just creates a bigger festering wound. What’s interesting is that our addictions naturally let go when the wound is dealt with and healed. The addictions are there to cover up the wound, and when your wound is met consistently with a soft sweet gentleness, the love moves through you healing everything inside you.
Our deepest wounds are our greatest teachers. It would be a travesty to ignore the most amazing teacher that shows up on your path. So dive through your anger, find your powerlessness, surrender to the stillness it’s offering, and embrace this entire process with warm tender caring energy every time. Do this ritual every day and practice it consciously. A powerful love will naturally sprout from your being and you’ll become a truly passionate alive being in your world. This is how you transform anger into love. You’ll know the shift happens when the situations where you normally would have been angry or frustrated at a friend or family member, you instead find a true healthy compassion rising naturally on its own accord.
With love all things are possible and nothing is impossible. With love, there’s this sensation that eternity is coursing through your every breath, and you could wait for ten thousand years for things to change. With love, your life is an unstoppable glorious adventure! Love is soooo powerful and because it feels so good, it instantly heals all the hard sabotaging energies that would have ruled your entire life. When you devote your life to love, you’ll find that light you need to find your way to true peace within your powerlessness. So let yourself bathe in unconditional love for yourself as much as possible. Love yourself as you are, no matter how messed up you think you are. Let love in. Let love be your guide. It will naturally transform your life into a profound healing experience that touches your very soul. Who you really are is the source of love, so surrender to that! There is nothing that can throw you off track when you know that love is your one and only guide.
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“There are no accidents or coincidences in this world. Nothing is by chance. Everything you’re experiencing is a direct manifestation of where you’re focusing your energy, attention and consciousness.” ~ Jafree Ozwald
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