By Jafree Ozwald
“Whatsoever you come across is God. You, the people you love, and people you hate, are all manifestations of God. The moment one recognizes that all as one, love arises on its own accord.” ~Osho
In 1996, I decided to break free from all of the ‘social rules’ and open my heart to embracing everyone I met with a big warm hug, I noticed something dramatic and deep had shifted inside of me. The life I once lived which felt separate and distant from others, soon became warm, fearless, and healing. I stopped feeling lonely as I was forming new relationships and connections that were based on a warmth that was beyond all social fear.
What was interesting was that in a few months I had retrained all these people to instantly open their arms and give and me a hug whenever we would meet again. It became assumed and automatic that we would embrace, and this deepened our trust for each other and for life. Soon my entire world was surrounded with meeting warm-spirited friends who instantly opened their hearts and smiles upon first sight. For the very first time in my life, I felt as if my heart had a home inside of every person in my life.
Becoming a hug-a-holic is a practice that requires a delicate balance of giving and receiving love. It honors where people are at in their ability to let in love, and yet lives under a very radical and rebellious assumption that most of society needs to hug each other more frequently. This doesn’t mean that you’re running up to embrace every single person you see on the street, although I would recommend seeing what happens just by making a “Free Hugs” sign and walking down the street as these beautiful brave souls have done in this free hugs video.
The hugs that I invite you to create throughout your week are deeper and longer-held hugs, that contain a natural heart-opening effect. When the embrace lasts for more than 10 seconds you start to awaken a deeper connection to your heart and spiritual path. When your heart truly opens up to the source of love, it becomes overflowing with such genuine fearless energy that you just have to share it with everyone you personally meet.
We are all craving connection since the Covid-19 plandemic began, and some people even feel that it’s become ‘illegal’ to hug and connect closely with others. For me personally, I just don’t care anymore if the other person is going to be offended if I open my arms wide to offer a hug to them. I’ve already let so many ridiculous social rules dictate my social life, and I’ve just had enough of this lockdown feeling that endorses fear and stops everyone from connecting in acts of love. I feel if we want to bring our world back to the old social norm, we must do it collectively on an individual level.
“Love is our true essence. Love has no limitations of caste, religion, race, or nationality. We are all beads strung together on the same thread of love. To awaken this unity–and to spread to others the love that is our inherent nature–is the true goal of human life.” ~Ammachi (the hugging saint)
There are many sacred resources hidden inside you that are not so easily accessed. Deep healing connections with the highest states of consciousness are truly just moments away. However, for you to find these inner gold mines takes the willingness to do some digging. You must open yourself up and let go of the old trenches you’ve been digging around in to discover a new treasure.
To give and receive the ultimate hug to the opposite sex (or same sex), you must understand that every heart-to-heart meeting you have is a short yet divine opportunity for each person to relax, rest and dive deep within themselves. The hug may last 3 seconds, 3 minutes, or maybe become horizontal and become a 3-hour cuddle. Anything is possible, it all depends on your intention, how open your heart is, and the level of bodily communication you create. The secret is not being attached to any outcome, and making every embrace genuine meaningful to your heart which is truly open and loving their heart.
The ultimate hug begins with the ultimate intention. Which is an embrace from both sides that becomes a gateway to entering the Divine. It’s like imagining you were going to step into the “Heart of God”. What would that feel like? When you step into this sacred place inside yourself, the other person will feel the shift in vibration.
Through intentional communication with your heart, your heart-opening practice with others will soon become a joyful habit that everyone looks forward to, and will soon manifest into the most amazing joyful life everyone could possibly live. Now get ready to experience 4 life-changing steps to giving and receive a truly healing hug!
THE 4 STEPS TO EXPERIENCE THE ULTIMATE HUG
Step #1 – Look people in the eyes when you meet them. Smile and give a first initial “I appreciate you” greeting just from your eyes. The eyes are the windows to the soul, so let the love come through them! Love the other person not because you should but because they are lovable, need love, and available for receiving love. Make this about giving love from your soul, and also receiving any love that you need to. This is not about trying to get them to give love back to you, yet be open to that when it does occur. Hugging is about intimacy and creating a connection with human beings that breaks through all your fears, walls, and limitations.
Step #2 – Allow your chest to physically touch the other’s chest. Embrace their body in the most gentle, slow, and loving manner that is deeply welcoming them into your heart. When the other embraces you, rest into the other person’s heart. Surrender any walls or fears you have, and melt for a few moments into the other’s body. Take a deep breath together with the person and exhale together. Ask them to breathe with you if they are open to it. Allow your heart to open and connect with the heart and being of the other soul.
Step #3 – Remain centered in your body as you embrace and surrender into the other. This is not about giving your heart away to the other person. They already have a heart so what would they need a second heart for? Enjoy the process of finding the balanced point in the very center of yourself in this experience.
It may become erotic or exotic if you’re attracted to the other, yet allow yourself to remain connected to your center, your heart, your truth, and essence. Merge yet remain centered in the merging. It can be very easy to get lost in the other, or to remain distant, separate, and in control. Find the middle path where you can breathe with them and be in their energy field and deeply rooted and centered in your essence at the same time.
Step #4 – When your bodies physically meet, find a level of full bodily embrace that feels enjoyable, healing, healthy, and relaxing for everyone involved. Some people will keep their pelvis (sex center) pulled back so as not to get to close, while others may push into you. Just find the middle ground where you’re not resisting nor pushing, yet meeting them with the heart, belly, and hips evenly.
It takes practice yet this is about learning how to let go of layers of social fears and sexual inhibitions we didn’t even know we had. To reach the more advanced levels of hugging, you may need to talk openly about these four steps in detail with your friend or partner. Practice hugging many times a day and get comfortable feeling what a real juicy hug is like for you!
PRACTICAL HUGGING TIPS
Here are a few helpful tips I’ve found that will make hugging anyone the most exciting and exploratory adventure. The very moment before you embrace, close your eyes and imagine exploring each new hug as if you were falling into the arms of God. It’s as if you just arrived in heaven and are greeted by the angels. Feel as if you’re coming home to the greatest love in the Universe! Trust this experience each time you hug someone and soon you completely transcend all old inhibitions and fear.
Another tip is to just open your arms and smile whenever you meet someone new. Don’t even think twice about it, just do it while you are genuinely smiling. Most people will just copy whatever you’re doing and open their arms too because social rapport is embedded into our very core. Most people don’t want to seem distant cold or closed down, so embrace them and love them as long as is comfortable for you and them.
Try to make it a habit of placing a hand for a few moments on someone’s shoulder or arm when talking to them. Notice how they respond with either softening or freezing up. The walls always want to melt yet often are too afraid to know how. Think that each connection you have with everyone you meet is an opportunity to liberate fear, especially those who are cold, resistant, and truly need a hug.
Whenever you first meet someone new, just open your arms wide and see how they respond. Maybe half of them will smile, open their arms and embrace you. Don’t have any expectations, this is a deeply transformative heart-opening practice that will change your entire life in more ways than you know.
Another tip is to practice tuning into your sensitivity to know how long to hug the other until they feel you in a deep and meaningful way. Do not get too discouraged if you or your partner freak out and step away after the first few seconds. You may not be able to immediately find this ultimate cosmic hugging experience. It may take time before some people trust this feeling of being embraced with unconditional love. It can help to educate your community and even share this email with those you want to share this divine experience with!
PRACTICE TRUST & LETTING GO OF FEAR
One of the most challenging and rewarding things we can do on the planet is to learn how to face our fears and truly connect deeply with people. This means being able to engage freely with others on the deepest emotional, spiritual, mental, and physical levels. When you are connecting with others fearlessly, in truly intimate heart-opening ways, you open up new energies of love, lightness, and joy within yourself: This fresh rejuvenated feeling offers the incentive to explore the deeper and more beautiful mysterious aspects of your spiritual nature.
The easiest and fastest way that I’ve found to shift out of any fearful head trip, is to take a deep breath and give myself permission for others to see and feel the real ‘me’ inside. This is not always easy because it eludes the other to believe that they also need to do the same. Yet, revealing that which cannot or should not be revealed, often allows a deeper trust to come in. This trust is the most essential aspect of being a fully alive spiritually awakened human being.
Remember, you are not here just to survive the system and become an accepted member of society. You are here to celebrate life, to dance, sing, play together and enjoy this amazing sensual body that you have. In order to do this, you need to bring awareness to the fear-based system that has educated everyone to remain separated, isolated on the phones, and lacking intimacy. Awareness brings about the ability to transcend. The more you’re aware of this old programming the easier it becomes to go beyond it.
Now more than ever, I feel so strongly in my heart that we need to teach our children how to liberate ourselves from any fear of breaking any social distancing rule. These rules have been planted in such old deep soil within everyone from generations ago. Back when you were a child, you were probably not aware of how deeply they were rooted and functioning in everybody around in everyday life. To be free from the generations of disconnection, means we must consciously invite in reconnection, and imagine ourselves opening up to a new future that is healing, warm, and beautiful.
HUGGING AS A SPIRITUAL PRACTICE
As a baby, you came into this world completely unrestricted, unguarded, and unafraid of being intimate with others. You were a bubble of bliss and your heart was naturally open, fearless, and unconditionally loving. You were constantly merging with everyone and everything you met. Giving and receiving touch was as natural as breathing. Then, throughout your childhood, a tight grid of social rules was unconsciously implanted upon you.
Now that you are a grown adult on the path of healing, personal growth, and self-realization, your job is to liberate yourself from every single limitation that has been imposed upon you. You are here to find freedom from every mental, emotional, social, physical, and spiritual prison you’re living in.
You are here to grow beyond all these walls. Breaking free from limitation is how you experience freedom. These ‘social rules’ are imperative to break free from as hugging does not hurt others, yet only helps them to face their fear and become free from it.
Yet, this level of liberation I’m speaking about is not just about going beyond the old Covid-19 social distancing laws, this freedom is much more evolved than that. This path is about finding freedom within yourself that is soooooo enormous, so ecstatic, and full of aliveness that every societal rule must bend and bow down on the path to greet you.
If you’re interested in discovering a new level of inner freedom and liberation in your life, my invitation for you is to start breaking free from that social programming that says, “keep to yourself” and God forbid don’t physically touch anybody you don’t know! Try on something radical and completely new here. Explore what it’s like to reformat your social software to experiencing physical touch with everyone you know and don’t know.
Your life is meant to be a juicy spiritual adventure overflowing with absolute aliveness. You are not here to just get by, survive or exist in a perpetual feeling of being separated, isolated, or avoiding touching other people. Human beings need gentle, warm, physical touch every single day to truly remain vibrant, happy, and healthy. It is vital and essential for your spiritual journey to be touched by others in order to welcome in a state of true mental, emotional and physical health.
The time that you have left here on earth is precious. It’s not worth wasting a single day on feeling distant and separate from others. Imagine how your heart will feel over the next 5 years if you become devoted to replacing every potential socially awkward and distant hello with a heartwarming hug. It’s the heart that is the doorway to our soul and spiritual journey. Open it wide and the most amazing life will follow.
“Enlightenment begins the moment when you are not and God is. It is a moment of absolute harmony. A window opens and you can see the whole sky. You are no more confined within the walls of your body and mind. A lightening happens and all darkness disappears” ~Osho
HOW TO HUG A STRANGER
It may first seem unnatural and fake to open your arms to a new person, a “non-hugging” family member, or someone in your community who you just don’t associate with on that physical heart-to-heart level. The hug may feel like you’re hugging a stiff oak tree, where you might receive a painful slap on the back. However, this new ultimate hug lifestyle that you’re learning begins with the patience that comes with teaching others how to hug.
Let them know why you are doing this hugging practice and what it means to your life. Being radically honest with people will only liberate you and them. You have nothing to lose but your ego and your previous relationship with fear. With a little practice, you’ll soon find each new embrace becomes easier, more fun, cozy than the last. In a very short while you’ll find the community around you then becomes a doorway to deeper healing and transformation within yourself.
When you stop caring about the social boundaries people have around truly embracing another being, you realize that there is an entire world of loving hearts available for you to connect with. Through a radical playful honesty with others about your new hugging life mission, you will free the mind from all social inhibitions and find the trust in the love that will guide you. It is your devotion to melting the walls everyone has around their hearts that the right words and actions will come to you, and will turn any socially awkward situation into the most enlightening and healing heart-opening connection.
Always remember that the heart is the doorway to God. There is nothing more socially powerful and personal than experiencing a deep merging embrace with a genuine heart-warming hug. By implementing hugging strangers as a simple daily practice, you will mend the many years of deep fragmented feelings you may be carrying inside. Most of us are crying inside desperate for someone to be courageous enough to break free from the overly controlled rigid social system that is trying to make everyone afraid of catching the flu that has a 99.9% chance of survival.
“The sun shines down, and its image reflects in a thousand different pots filled with water. The reflections are many, but they are each reflecting the same sun. Similarly, when we come to know who we truly are, we will see ourselves in all people.” ~Ammachi (the hugging saint)
HOW TO BECOME A HUG-A-HOLIC
The ultimate hugger is called a hug-a-holic. This person is addicted to hugging others, yet is not coming from a needy desperate desire to be touched. They are also not trying to be an efficient, effective “professional hugger” who is trying to open up all the wounded hearts of this world.
The real hug-a-holic is the one who is into expanding consciousness, opening up the love inside the heart, and consistently melting through the fearful egoic walls people have around theirs. All socially acceptable and unacceptable behavior comes from the ego and when you break through any social taboo such as hugging someone for 15 minutes in public, an entire Universe of healing and seeing the unlimited possibilities of love will definitely start opening up inside you.
When you start your hugging practice with people you might find a fear arises inside you from approaching those who aren’t ok with intimacy or their own sensuality. When you can break free from any fear of intimacy you are empowering yourself in more ways than you realize. This fear comes from our survival instinct that is terrified of being vulnerable. There is a deep inherent need to connect with people physically, and yet finding how to have real intimacy and healthy boundaries is the key.
The thing we run from is the thing we run towards. We all crave intimacy and are terrified of it. When you stop avoiding connection and start hugging new people you meet, I guarantee you that you’ll see all your fears easily evaporating every single day. The intimate connection with the unknown is the greatest fear we have. The truth is that everyone is on the same level when it comes to love because we all have a deep humility found inside our hearts. Every single one of us yearns to be held, loved, and cherished and this experience can be found inside every single being on this planet.
THE GREATEST HUGGING ADVENTURE
I invite you to open your mind this year to go on a real hugging adventure. Make the commitment from now on that each person you meet, you will naturally allow yourself to open your arms, move towards them with a loving smile, relax into your heart, and explore the magic that happens when you embrace. It could be a male or female, it doesn’t matter. What does matter is that you devote yourself to this hugging practice EVERY day?
Start breaking all the social hugging boundaries that you can. Hug your neighbor, the manager who you were upset at, your neighbor who you never talk to, and yes even the clerk behind the cash register! Get into the hugging habit with everyone new, especially when it feels uncomfortable.
You just don’t know how important your hugs may be for people. They might be considering committing suicide that evening and that warm hug from you might have just saved their life!! You just never know. That one person who is not so good at social interactions and perhaps has not been touched or hugged for many years may be right in front of you standing in front of your bathroom mirror. You are an amazingly sacred gift to the world. Make hugging your lifestyle and you’ll see how every interaction is a potential meeting with divinity.
THE WOLRD IS YOUR HUGGING PLAYGROUND
Being a human being at this time in life is a tremendous opportunity for healing. Use each day as a catalyst for your spiritual growth in this lifetime. Be responsible to see how all the people you interact with along the way are perfect ‘hugging mirrors’ for you. Each person is reflecting deeper levels of what is happening within your innermost hugging process.
You’ll find that the more you open, fearless, and intimate you can engage with others, interacting in a way that feels genuinely healing, liberating, and loving, then naturally each moment of life becomes this sacred healing source that finds its way into your heart, falling into every crack and crevice of your being.
Creating a warm welcoming cozy embrace with another forces us instantly melt how scared, isolated, and lonely we truly are. Most people are sooo afraid of rejection that they cannot take the risk to open their arms to hug another. The fear of being shunned, unaccepted, and avoided is so painful that they would rather remain closed and distant, being free from emotional risk. The problem is this irrational fear can be soooo pervading that this energy can have a paralyzing effect on every single social interaction you have.
If you look at your own social fears, what thoughts and feelings do you have that stop you from giving everyone a hug? If there was a part of you that was afraid of intimacy, how young would this part be and what fearful story would it be telling? The energy you’re spending in trying to connect with certain people is the exact same energy proportionally to what you’re spending trying to avoid certain other people.
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“The energy of your words is tremendous. I felt that yesterday reading your “Life of Jafree.” I also had a deeply precious experience last night listening to your self-love meditation. I’ve listened to a jillion guided meditations over the years, but none have moved and healed me the way that one did. Thank you. 🙏~ Milli Thornton, Moscow 🌺
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and so much more! Thanks Jafree. Please keep the inspiration coming! ~Jeremy Gard, Brisbane, Australia
Sending lots of love and lightness,
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